The miracle of the three S’s…

26 05 2012

Shit.

Shower.

Shave.

That’s all.

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May the force be with you. Just not with my wife…

24 05 2012

I was conned.

Conned into marriage.

“If and when you propose to me, I promise to watch Star Wars.”

I’m ashamed to say that this promise was not kept.

She has no interest in keeping that promise.

As you may have guessed, Abi has never watched Star Wars.

It’s got to a point where she is trying to prove a point.

I find this lack of enthusiasm, disturbing.

So, there are rules that as far as I’m concerned she must follow:

  • At no point can she sing the theme tune or any related tune (she was happily whistling the Imperial March in the kitchen yesterday evening, tut tut)
  • No putting any form of vocal enhancement to your mouth and doing Vader impressions (Lord Vader to you Abi)
  • You cannot, I repeat, cannot use any part of the script as a quote in day-to-day life
  • Further to the above you cannot even make clever references to the script e.g. May the 4th be with you, these are not the doughnuts you are looking for and so on
  • You cannot engage in any form of lightsaber activity
  • You cannot even hint at making light saber noises
  • If you find yourself driving in the snow at night, you cannot pretend you have jumped into hyperspace
  • Wearing a hoodie does not give you permission to act out any scene with Obi-Wan
  • If someone tries to engage in some witty Star Wars repartee, you must bow you head and say “I apologise, I have not watched Star Wars so cannot enter into a conversation with you”
  • In general, no fun that could be deemed related to Star Wars can ever be had

Feel free to send me / suggest any additional rules you think I should include.

I’ll update the list as and when suggestions come through.

Soon JJ will understand.

I, am your father.

Chewy and Han realise omitting windscreen wipers from the Falcon’s spec was a mistake.





The smile hunter misses again…

23 05 2012

I’d love to say I took this photo.

But I didn’t.

My hunt continues.

Haha Daddy! Mummy took this photo.





Conquering the world – an update…

22 05 2012

You may remember my mission.

The goal to get my blog read in every country, all 196 of them.

Well when I started I had covered 37 countries.

Not a bad start for a UK-based blog featuring the inane ramblings of a nobody.

So here’s the update…

I now have 40 countries.

I’d like to welcome on board the following:

Kenya.

Malaysia.

Mexico.

I salute you.

Free air guitar and happy thoughts are winging their way as you read this entry.

Remember, you can help my mission to achieve world domination.

Perhaps you are going on holiday?

Perhaps you are off on business?

Perhaps you are just on the run?

All you have to do is log on to my blog https://aminutewithme.wordpress.com on your travels.

If you know anyone in countries far afield, please send them the link.

As they say in Kenya, “asante sana.”





The smile hunter…

21 05 2012

The weekend gave me the perfect opportunity to capture my quarry.

All that solid time with JJ, surely I could photograph a smile?

No.

I catch colds with more efficiency.

As soon as I bring up a camera, the smile vanishes.

He does smile.

Honest.

I’ll prove it one day soon…

Close Daddy, but no cigar.





Some random photos…

19 05 2012

I stumbled across a really nice photo blog the other day.

Some great nature shots.

Made me think.

I was going to put photos up every so often.

Nothing special, just randoms.

So here goes.

Thanks for the inspiration Jeffery.

*edit* repeated a couple of photos from a previous blog, now removed!





Help me conquer the world, mwahahaha…

18 05 2012

Kitchener

I’m not massively into the stats of my blog.

It’s just a place to write about JJ’s progress and dump random thoughts.

If it was about getting stats, I’d have given up ages ago.

Afterall, my writings are not Pulitzer Prize winning material.

However, I did stumble across an interesting little stat area that grabbed my attention.

It was a map of the world showing where people had read my blog.

I found it quite odd to see that someone in Kuwait, Saint Vincent & The Grenadines and Nepal had been to my blog.

You may have seen from a previous blog that I’m collecting the Panini Euro 2012 stickers for JJ.

I now have a new collector mission.

To get every country to visit my blog.

They say we are all separated by 6 degrees of separation (or 7 depending on who you speak to) so hopefully it should not be too much of a mission.

Famous last words.

How many countries are there in the world?

I’m taking 196 as the benchmark as there seems to be a bit of disagreement around this figure.

How can you help?

Send my blog around the world.

I’m not doing it to have tons of followers.

I just want to collect all the countries and complete my map.

“What’s in it for me?” I hear you cry.

Free Air guitar or free happy thoughts sent your way.

Let me know if you are responsible for any of the countries and I’ll give you a special mention 🙂

I’ll keep you posted with progress but here’s the latest:

Here’s my conquered countries so far…