Set upon by pack hunters…

26 08 2014

My brother and his family were over from Malaysia the other weekend.

So we had a bit of a family and friends get together.

These days, this involves entertaining your kids and sending them off to bed before any serious drinking can start.

The various parents took it in turns to keep a watchful eye over about 10 kids as they ran around the garden with seemingly endless energy, only stopping to deal with tears when a toy was not shared.

There was a brief lull when rain stopped play and we headed inside.

And then it happened.

Out of the blue, there was a shrill battle cry of “ATTACK HIM!” from my little niece.

I don’t know why it happened

Perhaps they sensed weakness.

Perhaps I was an easy target.

Perhaps it was just my face.

But they rallied.

A chaotic pack of children suddenly became a well-drilled crack commando squadron with murder in their eyes.

300 Spartans would have taken a step back.

Like standing in the path of a landslide, my only option was to assume the foetal position and hope for the best.

For a few seconds I was a human Pinata.

I reached out for help to realise I was surrounded by baying parents willing their kids on.

Suddenly, a blond beacon darted into the murderous maelstrom.

JJ.

He ran over to me, pushing the other much bigger kids out-of-the-way shouting, “My Daddyyyyyyyyyyy!”

And briefly, they stopped.

But as fast as it had stopped, it began again.

To my horror, about 10 seconds later, I spotted said blond beacon with a cushion in his hand and murder in his eyes desperate to wade in and take his shot.

According to Wikipedia:

“A pack hunter … is a predator belonging to the animal kingdom, which has evolved to hunt its prey by working together with other members of its species.”

I had never considered children as pack hunters.

And I’d never considered myself as prey.

Lesson well and truly learnt.

IMG_7347

Apparently I’m a horse.

 

IMG_7382

Yup, still a horse.

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3 responses

26 08 2014
Al

Haha that’s brilliant 😀 Don’t you just love kids

26 08 2014
Frankwell

Yes, right up to the point when they jump on your head :S

26 08 2014
Al

And guff

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